Draft Ryan Kopf

Become the Jello King

We want Ryan to become king of the world of Jello that we are going to create. There will be so much jello, and it will be jiggly, and this world of jello will be completely unstoppable because nothing can be so still as to stop it from jiggling.

Try all you’d like, but the jiggling of the Jello shall commence.

Sign the petition

We want you to sign the petition that will allow us to demand that Ryan run. Far far away. Until he comes back with enough Jello to share.

Political issues

Economic Issues

We believe we should pool all the gold in the world under a big mountain vault with vast, expansive dragon-sized chambers. This will cause investor confidence to soar sky-high and improve the economy and the dwarf kingdom.

Social Issues

All races and classes should get along. Dwarves should be treated with respect by humans. The lands of Elves should not be ravaged by corporations. These travesties must stop in the name of peace and having a good land and kingdom. Only Ryan Kopf can help make this happen.